​​We are almost a month into our intrepid “Gap Year”, our intriguing home school experiment. We have been through a massive transition and feel unequal parts melancholy, bewildered, blessed, grateful, frustrated, and overjoyed.   (underlined words are vocab words for weeks 1-3)

In summary, we went this way because I felt it would be better for them and for me to have a year where they were home more than away and did school differently for a short season. Working from home with only Oaks left me feeling unfulfilled and almost sad as an extrovert and highly motivated worker. I thought, “This isn’t what I want vocationally or as a mom.” I made a change for me. 

I also looked at Oaks and thought, “He deserves the sibling connection E and A have.” I looked at Eli and Andi and thought, “If I have more working energy to give, I’d love to give it to you.” I wanted them to have more freedom to play, learn, explore and adventure and had the luxury to make a change so they could. I made a change for them.

To report in brief, we are achieving the dream. We have plenty of moments where it feels good, right, amazing and fun. And plenty of moments when the dream costs us all greatly. It’s really, really hard and really, really good, and even when it’s hard, its good.

• Andi gets frustrated and flops, and because Eli is so easily distracted by ANYthing.
• Oakley won’t play alone today and keeps bugging the kids intentionally or asking me to play with him in the middle of the my lesson to Eli. I want to say yes to Oaks but cannot.
• Eli cried when he got the consequence of me taking his water bottle away- which he took apart three times, refilled and tossed in the air as a massive distraction throughout the day.
• I am doing more work than they are. They barely put any effort with a good attitude. Instead they whine or distract themselves and don’t get it done. I return repeatedly to help or sit all the way through it. I thought they’d work more independently.

• Really hard because I can’t believe Andi throws attitude at me every day

• Really hard because Eli can’t sit still and focus, speaks rudely to me and gives up easily on surprising stuff.

• Hard because as siblings, they are fighting and using harsh tones. They are playing practical jokes and being dishonest when saying, “Mom is calling you Oaks” just to get him out of their way.

But wait, home school is great today because…

• Eli asked Oakley to build a cool magnet car with him “Just like we did yesterday… That was fun. “
• We got to go to a sunflower field with 4 young life girls.
• They read alone in the ENOs and then lay in them and listen to me read Little House on the Prairie. They beg for more.
• Christine came for lunch and we ate together on the deck outside.
• Daddy got to come home for lunch with us.
• I love hearing them pray for meals with gratitude and enthusiasm.
• We talked about John the Baptist and what it would mean to carry a message people didn’t want to hear…We want to stand and say, “Black Lives Matter” today.
• Andi is asking for breaks to play with her toys alone in her room. Her imagination and creativity gets air time today.
• We are not in a hurry to go anywhere and take our time getting into the school day because they all three found their own imagination outlet around the house from 8:30-9:45am
• Andi asks Oakley to play the cat game again
• Oakley gets to watch and play with them all day and they with him- they are getting to know each other as good, good friends
• I don’t feel lonely during the day
• A weekend has never felt so delicious- I couldn’t wait for weekend number one and it was a wonderful one- Labor Day weekend with projects, people, Worlds of Fun and actually staying in town.
• They cooked tacos on their own and were proud to tell  neighbor friend Will and our dinner guest.
• Great because they played outside throwing mud balls after listening to me read aloud for 30 mins and still wanting more. They were active, together, outside and creative. I felt like i was living little house on the prairie- reclaiming simplicity
• We went to Colorado on a Tuesday afternoon and saw Aunt Nat and Uncle John, Grandpa, Maama, Grammy and Granddad and Great Grandma! Plus we got to see the new Buchan house and visit with Bill, Tamara and Molly up on their mountain.
• I love them being here all day and feel a peace about it even in the Terrible Times 

Our community and classes, tutors and friends at Shawnee Classical Conversations is encouraging and helpful. GG is offering support and help, tennis lessons and GG mornings so I can keep up with my Young Life job and even go to the staff retreat next week. Drew is cheering me on and working hard at home after long work days at work.  

What we have to do is intimidating at times. What we get to do is tremendous. We are blessed and bound together.