February 10, 2016

African Wisdom for Ash Wednesday

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One of the sessions Drew and I attended at YL75 was on the African Leadership Tree…a method of developing people as leaders through one on one mentoring, life sharing, and cohesive mission. The deliberate and passionate stories, diverse among country and gender, encouraged us as we realized just how big the world is how easily God’s work happens in humbly brave vessels.

They shared “isms” and essentials that direct their mission day to day and year to year. They gave non-negotiables and palpable tenets to take home and contextualize. I said to my friend right next to me, “I want my family to be formed by these ideas.” So, in efforts to remember and begin, the list of YL Africa’s intentions:

In YL Africa, WE:

Listen- To God. To the Spirit. To each other
Sing– Every chance we get.
Dance- Every time the music plays. We are bodies, not just spirit.
Pray- Cannot live without this.
Walk- Everywhere. Everything we believe must walk.
Laugh- This is power. This is life.
Go- Wherever the Spirit calls and leads.
Stay- Even when it’s dark and dangerous
Love- God. Enemies. Neighbors. Brothers and sisters. Selves.
Obey- God. Spirit. Leaders God places in our lives.
Give- The nature of God. Greatest weapon against poverty: generosity.
Celebrate- Thank God and others every chance we get.
Welcome- Kids. Each other. Strangers. Aliens. Sinners. The Spirit

Furthermore, part of their DNA was described in these ways:

“Haraka Haraka Haina Baraka”– “The slow way is the fast way”. No shortcuts in the Spiritual life, friendships, planting/reaping, discipleship. We value the power of time over efficiency. Only time deepens relationships with God, kids and others. We believe that efficiency does not always equal excellence.
“Pamoja Pamoja” – “Together Together”. We are committed to unity and empowerment across every line- tribal, country, gender, class, language. We are a ministry of reconciliation.
Mangoes not tomatoes- Tomatoes grow easy and fast but we have to plant them every year. Mangoes take a few years to produce but then they produce fruit year after year on their own for over a hundred years. We choose to grow leaders the mango way- leaders to last, multiply, and transform.
Bend and not Break- Life is hard and unpredictable in Africa. Like the tree in the storm we need to be able to bend but not break. Flexibility is a high value.

Today is Ash Wednesday and time to experience a Lenten space for Jesus to enter.

My desire, this year same as most, is to empty, let go of, and lay bare what is empty, broken, hurried, frantic, without lasting meaning, and fleshy.

I’d like to give up complaining this year.

Can I make it a discipline that makes me rely on strength outside myself and calls me to rid of dark and fill with light?

Perhaps the African words of listening, laughing, dancing, staying, loving, obeying, and celebrating will call me out of complaints.

Anything on the list call out to you?

With all the world around me, sitting in my small place, I say,

Blessings on you in this season and take a walk.

More info on Young Life Africa here

February 4, 2016

New Year, New Words

Despite being a blog about words, I promise not to use too many.

I like words because they express meaning, make a statement, can be memorized, remembered, written in calligraphy or bubble letters, and communicate reality. Of course not only words express reality- so do our feelings, relationships, trips to loud waterfalls, quiet beaches, or majestic mountains, the whispers of the Holy Spirit, and the unforgiving weight of gravity, among so much else.

I guess what I want to affirm is that I have a great relationship with words, really enjoy them and prefer them to numbers. Give me words in a book, on a list, in a crossword puzzle, or a fortune cookie. I’ll take the words, leave the cookie.

Every now and then, we need some new words, lest our sentences sound stale (like a fortune cookie).

How about these this year? If not new to you, then props to you…your word bank is affluent.

Affable- characterized by ease and friendliness , pleasantly easy to approach and to talk to; friendly; cordial; warmly polite

Serendipitous- occurring or discovered by chance in a happy or beneficial way.

Magnanimous– upright, benevolent, considerate, forgiving, fair and generous

Implicit Bias – an implicit bias is a mindset held somewhat subconsciously or thoughts implied, but not expressly stated.

My friend Hilary told me about a discussion she led high school kids through regarding race, justice, and equality just before Christmas break. She used a tool called the implicit bias quiz from the MTV Look Different campaign. Their definitions:

Racial bias is a form of discrimination, often unconscious, that results in the different and unequal treatment of racial groups.
Gender bias is a form of discrimination that results in the unfair treatment or stereotyping of men and women because of their sex or gender. These attitudes are based on the beliefs that women and men should act, dress or behave in particular ways. Gender bias is mostly targeted at women but can negatively affect men as well.

The goal is awareness of what we hold deep inside and a movement to heal ourselves of the harm we did or could, cause.

The project offers a quiz that tests your implicit bias and supplies, not judgement but proactive work in dealing with your result.

I took the quiz today and am signed up for a bias cleanse. (Conincidentally, the Crossfit Northland Clean Eating Challenge began this week…cleansing all around..mind and body!)

Constructive tension- I reread MLK’s Letter from Birmingham Jail today. The letter is brilliant and oozes humility and hope from a man and for a cause where hope or humility would have been hard, if not impossible, for me to conjure up. On constructive tension he says,

I have earnestly opposed violent tension, but there is a type of constructive, nonviolent tension which is necessary for growth. Just as Socrates felt that it was necessary to create a tension in the mind so that individuals could rise from the bondage of myths and half-truths to the unfettere

d realm of creative analysis and objective appraisal, we must we see the need for nonviolent gadflies to create the kind of tension in society that will help men rise from the dark depths of prejudice and racism to the majestic heights of understanding and brotherhood.

Indeed, tension makes us move. Movement is better than stagnation, ignorance, or inaction when justice is within reach. Constructive, non-violent tension can open up conversations, force the deeply held but perhaps flawed beliefs to be spoken, debated, discarded and forgiven.

Last words…

– Appreciation Rampage. I heard this at yoga and it’s just what it sounds like. Inside your head or aloud, say one thing you’re grateful for… then another…then another…

-Okimafire– (oak-i-mma-fire) a cool mist humidifier.

This is the word you need if you’re putting Oakley to bed these days. Please tuck him in and turn on his okimafire before you leave the room.

Let’s go…and as we go, share our words for hope, healing, help, and higher consciouness.

Enough said.

January 27, 2016

Some Mom Moments: I said YES so WE…

…Held a Home Amazing Race and went on a Mommy/Daughter Date!

I hold it as a hallmark of my parenting, or at least my best intentions, to say Yes as often as possible. I want to be a “Yes-Saying Mom” to allow my kids freedom to express and employ their own ideas, to allow them to risk and enjoy, and to let go of my own control. Last week, because I said yes, we had some marked some major moments.

Some back stories:

Drew and I have loved watching CBS’s The Amazing Race with it’s whirlwind races around the world and complicated drama on the two-some teams. We love seeing the world and appreciate the edits that offer humor concise story telling. After watching 15 or so seasons together, Drew and I decided last fall, to let our kids in on our amusement. They loved it…even Oaks. They appreciated the challenges, the beauty and awe of the places they traveled on screen, and the nuances of the game as it was played between teams.

After we watched three shows, Eli’s self spilled out. Mid-episode, he said, “We should do our own family Amazing Race.”

This is quintessential Eli. He does not just consume or view life, he enacts it. He likes to make his own bands, sledding jumps, snow boarding practice hills, Rube Goldberg’s, arcades, restaurants, and even has one CD. (It features Drew on lead vocals and finds its way to be played when random adults guests are popping in.)

I digress. All this to say, I love to say Yes but sometimes, because Eli wants to actually create so many real life situations, I sometimes have to say No. “No we cannot build a salmon ladder for Ninja Warrior practice in our back yard…. “etc..

However, I wanted to say yes to this family/neighborhood Amazing Race request.

And I did so on Martin Luther King Jr. Day last week. I spent a day and a half writing clues, collecting items for the challenges, painting a check-in mat, and stuffing 40 envelopes with Route Info, Detours, and Road Blocks. We assembled teams with neighbors and some of their sleepover friends and had ourselves a little COVES Amazing Race 2016.

I was thankful my friend Taylor was wiling to enter the fray having very little idea what she signed up for when coming over that day. Turns out, she’s a strict but fair judge and a quick distributor of clues.

The four teams wore matching t-shirts (Drew and I have tons of the same clothes!) and completed nine tasks including: completing two mixed up puzzles, unscrambling block letters to spell the next destination (“fridge”), eating “gross” foods (cashews, pumpkin seeds, deer jerky, or pickles), climbing the tree to grab a bandana, sorting two shuffled decks and putting them in suit and number order OR creating a marble run track (that was the detour!), memorizing a quote by MLK Jr. (“Our lives will end when we stop caring about the things that matter.”) and scoring an air hockey goal against Goalie William.

Andi and Sydney- first place winners!

Team “#Speedy” reading their clue…ready to memorize.

The rules were simple. Read the whole clue. Work together always. Don’t give up. First team back to the mat wins.

They pushed through puzzle confusion, playing card overwhelmedness, and memory-blocked memorization.

They were patient with and encouraging towards their partners.

Each kid impressed me at some point with an overcoming of a fear, a tenacity towards a task, or a patience with their peer. They all had fun.

Background: Mallory and Lydia sorting decks. Front: Kiley and Kaitlyn on the other half of the detour, building a marble track.

You can do more than you think you can if you’re put to a tough task
It’s worth sticking it out even when it seems hard or impossible
Helping another person through something is a victory
When you’re competing, you try harder, faster and with your whole self (instead of sometimes giving up and walking away when you’re on your own)
Scavenger hunts are always fun.
Being on a team is a good thing. We need each other in life.

I was exhausted Monday night but will do it again…probably in the summer..and at the kids’ requests, with more of the neighborhood in play.

By Friday, I had revived my mom mojo and was ready for another YES.

Backstory. Andi has been wanting to go ice skating all winter. And, Andi did not want to attend the showing of Charlottes’s Web at school because Charlotte’s death moves her to tears and she wasn’t in the mood for a PTA sponosored sob.

When I asked Andi if, instead of going to the movie night at school which Eli was excited to do, she’d like to do something with Daddy, she said, “I want to do something with YOU Mom.” I was surprised- it’s usually Drew who gets picked for the fun extra stuff. Alas, I was a definite YES for this invite from Andi-girl.

She caught me checking on ice skating hours on my phone so I went forward with the ice skating idea- shucking off the scares of a 20 degree evening, 20 miles of driving and $20 of costs. It was worth it to see the light in her eyes, the enthusiasm in her gait, and the audible excitement in her speech all day. She felt it was going to be so great to be just us girls. I did too.

We went skating, shopping and to Starbucks. She did a great job skating and was undaunted by the falls or the falling temperature. She spun and smiled and took special care to stop and ask me, mid-loop, “What was something you did with Oakley today Mom?” It was a shot straight to the heart of this mom who LOVES thoughtful questions. Andi one-upped herself later in loving me, when she asked if the radio could be turned off so we could “just talk” while we drove. This girl!

After skating, we shopped for loud leggings (she really wants pants with cupcakes, cats, or dogs on them) with no success, and then went to the Plaza Starbucks for hot chocolate and whatever else she wanted, which ended up being a blueberry muffin and a chocolate chunk brownie.

The night was magical. And because I said YES to Andi, I learned a lot about how we are together.

I realized most of the context of my mothering of her exists in instructions, requests, demands or questions. I think I mostly tell her what to do instead of simply slowing down, stopping everything, and playing with or listening to her. Or, when I do slow down and lean in, I’m also still half invested in cooking a dinner, or often interrupted by a brother, a text message, or a trip to the bathroom.

When we were out together, I had nothing to do but be with Andi. It was amazingly apparent we need more of these times.

We were glad to come home, giggling and tired, and learn the boys had a good night at the movie too.

I don’t get it right all the time and surely give my kids a fair share of struggle with me as their mom, but I think the race on Monday and the date on Friday will be memories we all share that tell the bigger truth: we are a family who does love, adventures, invitations, and yeses pretty well most of the time.

January 21, 2016

Blessings Big and Small

There are so many ways my life is great.

We have a wood burning stove and have enjoyed building, feeling the warmth of, and watching the beauty of, fires at home this week.

Thank you Binny and Bill Pearce for the wood and the fire place tools plus wood tote bag!

Our washer washes really big loads.

Very helpful for my laundry once a week rhythm!

The circle of our first floor.

When we lived in our first house, I always loved going to houses that had “a circle” for my kids to run in between rooms. Now we have a circle of our very own and my fears that my older kids would be too big, are totally moot. Eli, Andi and Oaks regularly run, alone or all three, around and around and around. My heart is so happy hearing that pitter-patter of feet.

Andi plays with Oaks.

I had always wondered if the four-and-a-half-year gap between Andi and Oaks, and the six-years-and-2-month gap between Eli and O

aks, would leave Oakley in lonely sibling land. No way. Once again, why did I fear? Andi, especially, has always paid good attention to Oakley. She has always tre

ated him as a real friend, a capable playmate, and an equal in any imaginary world. They share an eye and mind for puzzles and can enjoy quiet, alone, imaginative play- manipulating a character out of any plastic creature- with a voice, a struggle, a family, and often, an injury that needs an Andi created cast. Their times together are precious and I’m lucky to have a view from the kitchen as they play in their own world right over there.

I only work part-time.

As much as I sometimes struggle to find part-time child care for days I need to work, or for the times when I cannot focus on work because I’m home with kids and trying to work, I really, really treasure the flexibility, time with my kids, and the wardrobe.

Words that right me when I’m crooked:

Philippians 4:6-7 (Message) “Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.”

Life is full. I am blessed. I will give out of the fullness of all I have received.

January 13, 2016

A Vent After Vacay

What I want to write about today is how much it is taking out of me to take care for Oakley in his current stage of attitude, emotional fit throwing, and obstinate disobedience.

But, when I start to write down what has been “Soo Hard” about my day with Oaks today, it seems ridiculously small, insignificant, fleeting, and whiny! Which, of course, proves that I am whiny and don’t deserve to talk about raising a three year old as actually having a real problem.

Plus, it’s indescribable how it is in our house at the loudest, craziest moments and should probably stay that way. Our moments of noise sound out and then seep into the walls and ways of our family history- a bit messy, often energetic, openly communicative, active, intense, in home and out-and-about, bent on being together, and showered in grace for and from each other, that we gather from God who gave us this gift and helps us hold together.

Alas, I won’t vent in angst, but with thanks.

I just returned from the Young Life All-Staff Conference/Celebration: YL75.

Drew and I went together, without our kids, and joined 5,000 other staff and spouse Young Life friends. We filled the second largest hotel in America, (The World Center Marriott in Orlando) and half the Port Orleans Disney hotel with attendees. And we overflowed the tiny Marriott Starbucks- the lines at Disney paled in comparison.

From my single seat in a crowd the size of three huge high schools, I heard, saw and felt richness in most every aspect of a mission based vacation.

We got great gifts- sunglasses (thanks to the TOMs founder Blake and his YL connections!), surprises, and excellent speakers and sessions.
Drew and I enjoyed each other and being OFF– of work, of parenting, of cold Missouri weather, of Christmas chaos, of household work…Oh my how well we get along with no real responsibilities. Funny how the inconvenience of caring for others and cooking can disrupt our couple zen. Ha!
We absorbed great conference content:

Louie Giglio encouraged us to continue to take on the weight of what it takes to make a significant change in someone’s life. (Mark 2)

Efrem Smith spoke with loving admonition to: turn up the volume on kingdom compassion, have the kingdom of God move with expansion and inclusion to welcome the untouchables and outcast into our midst, and join a revolution that Jesus has wrought from the beginning to say all lives matter equally to God but not in the world, which is a call to the church to step into the hell of marginalization and reach deep into the muck and mire to lift people out with the love, hope, and light of Christ.

Jen Hatmaker said today’s adolescence value: community, justice, anti-consumerism, and mentorship. They don’t need “cool”, the world gives them “cool,” but instead real adults showing up in their lives, present and available and lasting. (Very encouraging to increasingly un-cool 35 year old me.) They are looking for people to lead them with their life, not their speeches. She encouraged YL to continue to reach this generation by any means, wherever the gospel is rising- giving kids a safe place to ask their questions, share their struggles, and fill their emptiness.

Worship and presentations by YL from Africa where staff people are vigilant, kids engage with Jesus, and people dance daily. The whole time they shared, I felt smaller and smaller in our world that is so big, with so much outside my experience, education or imagination. I loved feeling little because it made any problems or fears I had shrink to their appropriately minuscule proportions.

We had EXPERIENCES. A night with fireworks and characters and a birthday party just for Young Life’s 75th year, at Hollywood Studios. Then a day at Universal Studios with my friend Alex. Really fun roller coasters, really tasty butter beer, really long lines, and really a lot of fun. (Check out the theme of food and drink in these pics!)
And yet, as we walked past families experiencing Disney’s best with their kids, I couldn’t help but think of the gift we’ve been able to give our kids of adventure, humor, surprise, and good food in a crowded room when we go to Castaway in the summers. To be known, loved, tossed in the lake, and freed to play in the safest community anywhere, the gifts Young Life has given us as a family through assignments, might just trump a day at Disney.

I felt affirmed and spurred on, Drew felt encouraged in the mission, and we loved seeing our friends from Chicago, Nicaragua and a few places in between.

We are thankful our kids were cared for so well at home that they cried when Maama left, and wished for another night with GG and Pops.

I can’t wait to keep marinating on the memories and walking out the invitation to kingdom expansion and inclusion here in Park Hill.

5000 people with 5 finger flashlights held high. We pledge to take the light into dark places going forward for another 75 years.

Thank you YL75 for a wonderful week..

And thank you Oakley for taking a nap long enough that I could breathe and refocus…

Saying “Thank You” is so much better than saying “Poor Me.”

December 24, 2015

On the 10 days of Colorado Christmas…Our 14-Peopled-Love Will Give

1

Ninja warrior competition for kids in Denver for Eli’s Christmas present from Maama. All his hard work in trees, our back yard, and the CFN gym paid off as he was strong, balanced, brave, friendly, and unbound in his exploration of a space made for adventure.

2

Trips to Colorado in 4 days for Drew who came for the competition, then went back to work, and then came back for Christmas.

3 kids

of mine who I love to see play the days away without school, with each other, outside in Colorado sunshine.

4 Christmas cookies

that we eat before noon.

5 COUSINS!

Eli, Andi, and Oaks are loving Christmas with their little cousins June and Vienna.

6 Cavities

found while getting our teeth cleaned. 5 for Andi and 1 for Mommy. Agghhhh! The good news: Oaks was a great patient for his first ever visit to dental hygienist Maama!

7 Projects

we did for Mom with planning (Laura), tenacity (Natalie), expertise (John), skill (James), climbing coordination (Scot), many a job (Drew) and clean up (Kim).

8 Ways we see God

in conversations with each other, smiles on baby faces, a table full of life and love, joy, truth told, and forgiveness.

9 Clues

solved leading to our escape from the Toys in the Attic Epic escape game! Team Eli, Andi, Drew, Linds and Maama solved in 51 minutes. Unfortunately, we lost all our aunts and uncles to zombies in the room below.

10 Luminaries

lit along the path I want to light from Grammy tonight.

Light in the darkness. Warmth in the cold. Love all around.

December 9, 2015

Towards Next Year Now

Nestled into our kitchen corner from NYE- it stayed put all year!

Today marks day 342 of the year 2015. With 23 days left this year, time wanes and goals might be going unmet.

I don’t remember what I set out to do in 2015 but do remember the way we welcomed the new year: with family, shared experiences, a party in house with games, good food, and a solid soundtrack. Looking back now, I’d say many of those favorites found their way into wonderful moments and experiences, ordinary and extravagant, all year long. With a new niece, my first nephew, great jobs, health, family, traveling, and joy, our year was a very good one.

Outside of my direct experience, 2015 held hardship, horror, and helplessness for many of God’s children in the U.S. and around the world. How do you move ahead if the year behind you took away something you held so dear? How do you move forward past discouragement, pain, and fear towards new hope and a fresh start if you’ve lost a lot of power or all of your trust?

The mantle marks the memory-making season

Honest intentions, basic needs, or disciplined desires need time to surface. Perhaps now, 23 days before the new year comes, is the time to look back and think ahead.

When I hosted a Christmas party this week, I asked the room to light a candle and share two words: one that summed up 2015, and one to direct 2016.

My friends shared bravely and directly, trusting that to say it out loud and light a candle, meant darkness will become enlightened, and the hopes for the future will have feet to run on.

They spoke of a year that was complicated, fun, surprising, hopeful, hard, and full of joy, worry, anxiety, running and growth.

Looking forward with light to lead them, my friends held out words that would call them to: let go, play, navigate, heal, be brave, have hope, set intentions, and connect.

How about you?

What can you look back and see from the days behind you this year?

What do you want to hold onto, let go of, raise higher, or erase forever?

How will you walk, lead, dream, parent, work heal, play, let go, hold on, or choose this next year because of,or in spite of, what this past year has held?

Who will you be for yourself and what will you do for others?

What is the word that sums up the pace, priorities, and experiences of 2015?

What is the word to guide your ways and days in 2016?

When you have the words, tell me or someone else so they begin to become more real right away.

I’ll end with the Pope Francis’ Jubilee word: “mercy” and affirm his hope that doors would open in mercy so that “anyone who enters will experience the love of God who consoles, pardons and instills hope.”

Photo and quote from BBC News

November 24, 2015

When Sno-Cones Speak to Thanksgiving

I have been happily hosting questions, musings, and wonder in my head this week as Thanksgiving Day and celebrations approach.

What does it mean to give thanks?

Whats the opposite of thanks?

First, the verb.

To give something requires you to offer something you have to someone else. Giving can be partial, (give some money, some time, some attention) or complete (all of your heart, the whole piece of hard candy, or Jesus’ whole life laid down), but happens with a transfer of possession: something I have, I choose to give to you.

In the dictionary, definitions for “give” include, “to supply, impart”, and “to present gifts.”

As we approach Thanksgiving, perhaps the action of giving thanks should be our sacrifice to impart or supply a gift to another.

An illustration: For two years in a row, Kristin and I have served for a shift at the school carnival sno-cone stand. Every kid there can have one free sno-cone; they need only to stand in line. When they approach the table, every kid can choose blue, red, or purple, or the mix of all three. We scoop, squirt, and hand it over. When we serve about 100 sno-cones in an hour, we accumulate a bit of data about children’s thanking habits. Indeed, saying “Thank you” or “giving thanks” is part habit. From year one to two, our data is very similar.

About half of the kids who grab a sno-cone say thank you. Between us, we have six kids, we admit the 50/50 ratio applies inside our families.

I am willing to totally take into consideration the carnival environment: a highly energetic, chaotic, fun, busy, and sugar-filled night with friends. Even the most polite kid might slip out of thanking practice. However, I’ve been thinking about how much it bothers us and why. What does it mean when a kid stops with sno-cone in hand to look back and say, “Thank you?” I think it means they are willing to give attention, pause, and appreciation. It means they acknowledge, us, the person behind the gift and reception of something they would not have had without help. When they don’t, we feel a bit ignored, unappreciated, and like our finger are so, so cold.

Perhaps to give thanks is to acknowledge our own limits. Saying thank you reveals our dependence on others to get what we want, or other times, desperately need.

If we are not giving thanks, what are we doing? What is the opposite of thanks?

Now the noun.

Without prefixes, modifiers, or any participles, what follows are some opposites from my own behavior.

When I’m not giving thanks, I might be giving:

demands
excuses
opinions, or
complaints

All of which have their place in thoughts, conversations or blogs (ha!), but none of which should replace a moment where thanks should be given.

So for thanksgiving, I’m going to try to supply gratitude, impart appreciation, realize I cannot exist or thrive on my own, name the gifts I’ve received for which I am so thankful, and spend time with people who I love and appreciate so very much.

I hope to have thank-filled conversations. Drew found this Seth Godin gift, The Thanksgiving Reader, for a 20 minute communal reflection on Thanksgiving around a table or living room. Absent from Seth’s beautiful compilation is the reminder of James 1:17-18,

” Whatever is good and perfect is a gift coming down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. He chose to give birth to us by giving us his true word. And we, out of all creation, became his prized possession.”

Happy Thanksgiving.

May you give and receive, to and from, God and others,

the blessings of grace, an attitude of gratitude, and the wonder of watching as you pause and enjoy.

November 11, 2015

Cloth Napkins and Happy Birthday Carol

The only way to follow up a long blog about an unbelievable journey through the World Series that ended in a Royals WIN, is obviously to write about cloth napkins and my good friend Carol.

Carol is one of my best friends and a Missouri foundation of support and love. I come to Carol for friendship, love, wisdom, support, ideas, help, and advice. Carol comes to me with love, help, smiles, faithful blog readership, and bagels, books, gifts, and Sonic for my children.

Carol thinks of others more than she thinks of herself and is always willing to help. I have received so much from Carol, its now one of my favorite things to be asked to help her in some small way. Carol came into my life to offer transactional babysitting and became a best friend. Over the past almost decade, we’ve walked many miles, drank much wine, prayed many prayers, sunned by many pools, listened and talked for countless hours, and grown up a little bit ,the both of us. Happy Birthday Carol.

One more thing about Carol- she uses cloth napkins too.

There are a few things I’ve done my whole marriage long: enjoyed Drew as my favorite everything, and used cloth napkins.

We learned about cloth napkins through our good friend Binny who used them for every meal, and then threw them on the wooden stairs leading up to her second floor laundry. I love the memories of nights we shared around their table, napkins on my lap during Chief’s party afternoons, and that pretty pile of used napkins on her steps.

I got some napkins for my wedding but have bought most myself. Most of my napkins are 10 years old now and receive daily use. I’ve started to collect some seasonal ones and made some (with Binny’s help) for my sisters and mom a few Christmas’ ago.

I love them for how sturdy they are, how comfortable they are to use on our mouths, hands, and laps and how little waste they create. I don’t mind the washing and folding of them at all. In fact, I’m minding it less and less as Andi becomes more and more adept at folding herself!

My recent appreciation of my cloth napkins came when I packed a picnic for Oakley and me a few weeks ago. I packed two cloth

napkins which we used as a “plate/tablecloth” on the rock and as a napkin. It was easy to pack in and pack out. I was already using a cloth lunch bag and Tupperware. so the lunch was completely trash free, in addition to Oaks and me being comfortable with our cloth in the great outdoors.

For what its worth, I recommend them. Perhaps you’ll consider them for your Thanksgiving table or Christmas wish list!

November 5, 2015

World Series Champs and Other Wonders

We have lived life to the fullest in an abundance of autumn adventures. It’s been unbelievably exhilarating and exhausting as well.

The really good kind of tired…

Accomplishment and exhaustion can go hand in hand. After you’ve run a marathon, hiked a mountain, or had a baby, you feel spent in each and every muscle, all emotions, and most mental capacities. It’s a very satisfying sleepiness. When you’ve stayed awake all night to write a paper, finish a project, or accomplish a task that ends up completed before morning, turning it in and walking away feels so good you can make it through the few hours you have to live before a nap.

Waking up on Monday morning, November 2nd, at 4:45am, meant I had slept for 3.5 tossing and turning hours. I was up to coach the early class at the gym and awoke very tired but very exhilerated. The Royals had won the World Series at 11:30pm the night before. I had sweated, waited, began to lose hope, then jumped, cheered, ran, hugged, screamed and celebrated with high fives, hugs, and spraying champagne. Most all of my favorite Missouri people were gathered in one room and we had soaked it in past midnight. Drew and I went to bed at 1:30am with smiles, and still a bit of disbelief, on our faces. I was tired on Monday morning. A very satisfied kind of sleepy.

For the 2015 Postseason, Sunday night’s capstone was a most perfect ending to what became an unbelievable, unprecedented, and very, very fun to watch, October.

Unbelievable and unprecedented because:

Royals Post season record: 11-5 That’s a lot of wins and not very many losses- but shows they didn’t win by sweeping and knocking other teams out. They fought and clamored for almost every single win!
Runs scored after the 7th inning: Royals: 40, Other Teams: No more than 5
Runs scored after the 6th inning: Royals: 51, Other Teams: No more than 11 combined across all games.
*The Royals trailed by at least two runs and came back to win in seven of the 11 games! (in six games, they trailed into the 6th inning!)
*In the World Series itself, the Royals were down in ALL FIVE games. They went on to win in three games in which they trailed in the eighth inning or later. *World Series Record
We met the Moose Man at Hyvee!

Call to the Banana pen?

People said and wrote about “…keeping the line moving one hit at a time”, “…never saying ‘Quit'”, “…never believing it was over or out of reach”, players that comprised a power line-up, a manager that just let them play, and a GM who crafted a team six years ago with defense, charisma, speed on the bases, and solid pitching in mind, and who made moves along the way to make it actually happen.

The city thanked the team for bringing baseball’s biggest victory back here after 30 years, for bringing a city together in rallying cheers, and giving us a month- long party.

The team thanked the city for unwavering support, attendance, spirit, fervor, and interest.

Gratitude did indeed appear to be the atmosphere at the celebration parade on Tuesday. With streets backed up and packed in, with roofs and trees dangling people from edges, a whole city wore blue and came to one small part of the city to cheer on a team that couldn’t help but humbly take in the crowd and wave back. We walked from North Kansas City for 1.9 miles to be four people deep with great views of the players, coaches, and families on their trucks.

Tuesday November 3rd was a holiday in Kansas City and should continue to be until we win again. It was the best sort of snow day there could ever be. A “snow day” with sunshine and closed offices and cancelled appointments and everyone from child to elderly executive, with obvious martyrs (think essential medical personnel and waiters and bartenders who worked for everyone’s party day!) and naysayers (people who don’t care about sports at all- even transcendent sport moments, I guess) in-between, together in one crowded place, with one common celebration and a kind and easy-going spirit. The mass of blue-clad humanity swarmed the Station and showed the world how many people have come to care in KC.

As a small piece of the blue mass, our personal postseason included:

Morning newspaper pour-over sessions. Reading high lights and predecitions, soul stories and moving recaps. Appreciating the pictures and the personalities as a whole family.
Late nights out and about. With no cable TV to supply the channels for the Division or Championship Series, we packed up our family to watch games at Chris and Melissa’s, a Ruby Tuesday restaurant, our new neighbor’s the Ponds, Jim and Jan Bruce’s house, Gayle and Steve Osborne’s house, bits of it at Young Life watch parties at Tate Summa’s house, and Mike and Carol Graves’ house. Our kids were late night troopers who watched, played, or read while the comebacks roared through living rooms and basements.
Radio game calls– the ALCS Game 2 against the Blue Jays was a late innings comeback that we listened to at home on our radio on a Saturday afternoon. Nothing beat the ALDS Game 4 however against the Astros where I listened with Oaks in the basement here at home.
Special food and drinks: World Series Game 1 salmon at home, ALCS Game 6 fried green tomatoes and guac at the Graves, a Crown Royal shot before World Series Game 4 for “Taking the Crown” good luck, Minsky’s “fancy” pizza at James and Laura’s for WS Game 2, the Blue Walk off at Chappels on parade day, and much more. Eli, Andi and Oaks talked us into more sugar and pop drinking than we usually allow because, “Hey, it is the Woooorld Serieees!”
Their FIRST post season game. Andi and Eli got in on the gift of attending ALCS Game 1 at Kauffman where we had seats in right field from which we saw the 5-0 victory over those power-hitting Blue Jays. Quotable game moments: “Andi, watch this pitch. This is a big pitch.”- Drew’s very true but very un-seven-year-old girl appropriate comment in the 8th inning of a long baseball day. And, “Throw him a chair!”– the yelling adage from exuberant and repetitive fan in the section next to us and right on top of James and Laura. He was montonous but accurate- the Royals pitching “sat down” many a Blue Jay.
Cumulative efforts. What I loved and will remember is how much every player on the team contributed in some way game after game. I appreciate the very literal “team” approach they took to wrestling their way to a win or clawing the victory away from the other team. They attacked as a group and won with and because of each other. Most of our watch parties came together with a team effort as well!
THE BEST HALLOWEEN EVER. October 31st was a Saturday. Eli and Andi played their last soccer game on their coed, 2nd and 3rd grade, YMCA soccer team. Quinton and Erica game from St. Louis and got to see the two games. Then we worked as a family to get ready for our 6th annual Halloween party. People came at 5:00pm in costume and bearing side dishes and goodies. They indulged me my games for which even the weather cooperated. As extended family and friends came through for pictures and greetings and good, good food our party total topped 44 people and two dogs. Twenty or so stayed for the duration of World Series Game 4 which started at 7pm (the first hour of which we did our trick-or-treating with Oaks absolutely appreciating every second of it audibly), and was displayed on two TVs in our house. Yes, we borrowed a TV for the big game. Half the people watched in the family room (six people on my new sectional- a dream realized!) and half in the kitchen (including me with a seat way too close to the Candy Corn mix!). We all got to watch the Royals come back to win in the 8th. Seriously a wild adventure and a wonderful way to watch a win- with a house-full of great people and kids full of candy. And finally, a daylight savings gift that gave us an hour back that night we’d very much need for the next game.
Big Life Moments: Oakley turned 3 on October 11th- ALDS game 3 (a loss!) and we switched him to a big-boy bed on October 27th. He grew up as the Royal’s clinched titles. I held my two big fall Young Life retreats around ALCS games 5 and 6. Heavy hearted, I went to a funeral in Springfield for my staff friend who lost her 29 year old son to an ocean accident on the day of World Series Game 1.

Hope comes up from creeping defeat. A celebration for some is a season ending sadness for others. Joy can stand right next to fear and gloom. A night of striking out can end in a single that turns the tone of the game. The Royals journey to the World Series and come from behind winning of that series, gave us a schedule altering, blood pressure raising, community building, party excusing, memory-making fall.

Thank you Royals for doing your job with a passion for excellence, attention to hard work, and concern for others. Thank you for playing when your own life was falling apart and your body was beat up. We appreciate the show, the adventure, and the victory.

Reign well, Crowned Champions.

Appendix 1:

Below are photos of where we were and the differing levels of tired our kids were when the Royals actually WON THE WORLD SERIES!

Appendix 2: Little somethin-somethin extra I found…Here are great videos of the final World Series Game- Game 5 on Sunday November 1st. Courteous of MLB.com.

http://m.mlb.com/video/v527669683/must-c-comeback-royals-rally-to-tie-game-in-9th/?game_pk=446277&mode=video&partnerId=LR_highlight and http://m.mlb.com/video/v527627783/ws2015-gm5-royals-take-lead-with-five-runs-in-12th/?game_pk=446277&mode=video&partnerId=LR_highlights