A Prescription for Inscription

Nestled into our kitchen corner from NYE- it stayed put all year!

Today marks day 342 of the year 2015. With 23 days left this year, time wanes and goals might be going unmet.

I don’t remember what I set out to do in 2015 but do remember the way we welcomed the new year: with family, shared experiences, a party in house with games, good food, and a solid soundtrack. Looking back now, I’d say many of those favorites found their way into wonderful moments and experiences, ordinary and extravagant, all year long. With a new niece, my first nephew, great jobs, health, family, traveling, and joy, our year was a very good one.

Outside of my direct experience, 2015 held hardship, horror, and helplessness for many of God’s children in the U.S. and around the world. How do you move ahead if the year behind you took away something you held so dear? How do you move forward past discouragement, pain, and fear towards new hope and a fresh start if you’ve lost a lot of power or all of your trust?

The mantle marks the memory-making season

Honest intentions, basic needs, or disciplined desires need time to surface. Perhaps now, 23 days before the new year comes, is the time to look back and think ahead.

When I hosted a Christmas party this week, I asked the room to light a candle and share two words: one that summed up 2015, and one to direct 2016.

My friends shared bravely and directly, trusting that to say it out loud and light a candle, meant darkness will become enlightened, and the hopes for the future will have feet to run on.

They spoke of a year that was complicated, fun, surprising, hopeful, hard, and full of joy, worry, anxiety, running and growth.

Looking forward with light to lead them, my friends held out words that would call them to: let go, play, navigate, heal, be brave, have hope, set intentions, and connect.

How about you?

What can you look back and see from the days behind you this year?

What do you want to hold onto, let go of, raise higher, or erase forever?

How will you walk, lead, dream, parent, work heal, play, let go, hold on, or choose this next year because of,or in spite of, what this past year has held?

Who will you be for yourself and what will you do for others?

What is the word that sums up the pace, priorities, and experiences of 2015?

What is the word to guide your ways and days in 2016?

When you have the words, tell me or someone else so they begin to become more real right away.

I’ll end with the Pope Francis’ Jubilee word: “mercy” and affirm his hope that doors would open in mercy so that “anyone who enters will experience the love of God who consoles, pardons and instills hope.”

Photo and quote from  BBC News

I have been happily hosting questions, musings, and wonder in my head this week as Thanksgiving Day and celebrations approach.

What does it mean to give thanks? 

Whats the opposite of thanks?

First, the verb.

To give something requires you to offer something you have to someone else. Giving can be partial, (give some money, some time, some attention) or complete (all of your heart, the whole piece of hard candy, or Jesus’ whole life laid down), but happens with a transfer of possession: something I have, I choose to give to you.  

In the dictionary, definitions for “give” include, “to supply, impart”, and “to present gifts.”

As we approach Thanksgiving, perhaps the action of giving thanks should be our sacrifice to impart or supply a gift to another. 

An illustration: For two years in a row, Kristin and I have served for a shift at the school carnival sno-cone stand. Every kid there can have one free sno-cone; they need only to stand in line. When they approach the table, every kid can choose blue, red, or purple, or the mix of all three. We scoop, squirt, and hand it over. When we serve about 100 sno-cones in an hour, we accumulate a bit of data about children’s thanking habits. Indeed, saying “Thank you” or “giving thanks” is part habit. From year one to two, our data is very similar.

About half of the kids who grab a sno-cone say thank you. Between us, we have six kids, we admit the 50/50 ratio applies inside our families.

I am willing to totally take into consideration the carnival environment: a highly energetic, chaotic, fun, busy, and sugar-filled night with friends. Even the most polite kid might slip out of thanking practice. However, I’ve been thinking about how much it bothers us and why. What does it mean when a kid stops with sno-cone in hand to look back and say, “Thank you?” I think it means they are willing to give attention, pause, and appreciation. It means they acknowledge, us, the person behind the gift and reception of something they would not have had without help. When they don’t, we feel a bit ignored, unappreciated, and like our finger are so, so cold.

Perhaps to give thanks is to acknowledge our own limits. Saying thank you reveals our dependence on others to get what we want, or other times, desperately need.

If we are not giving thanks, what are we doing? What is the opposite of thanks?

Now the noun.

Without prefixes, modifiers, or any participles, what follows are some opposites from my own behavior.

When I’m not giving thanks, I might be giving:

• demands
• excuses
• opinions, or
• complaints

All of which have their place in thoughts, conversations or blogs (ha!), but none of which should replace a moment where thanks should be given.

So for thanksgiving, I’m going to try to supply gratitude, impart appreciation, realize I cannot exist or thrive on my own, name the gifts I’ve received for which I am so thankful, and spend time with people who I love and appreciate so very much.

I hope to have thank-filled conversations. Drew found this Seth Godin gift, The Thanksgiving Reader, for a 20 minute communal reflection on Thanksgiving around a table or living room. Absent from Seth’s beautiful compilation is the reminder of James 1:17-18,

” Whatever is good and perfect is a gift coming down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. He chose to give birth to us by giving us his true word. And we, out of all creation, became his prized possession.”

Happy Thanksgiving.

May you give and receive, to and from, God and others,

the blessings of grace, an attitude of gratitude, and the wonder of watching as you pause and enjoy.

Comeback. Magic. Awe. Unbelievable. Repeat. Remember. Elimination. Expectation. Pressure. Celebration. Unlikely victory. It’s never over til it’s over. Thrilling. Exciting. Stressful. Hopeful. Youth. Experience. Management. Dugout speeches. Rally. Doom to Boom. Overcoming. Believing. Coming together. Listening. Watching. Playing. Hoping.

These are our buzz words. This is our emotional roller-coaster. Kansas City is turning blue- from fountains to footwear. Today’s teachers and bank tellers are wearing t-shirts and jersey’s with jeans instead of ties and suits and dresses. Kindergartners and 86 year-olds are wearing Royal’s gear. “Go Royals” is a greeting just as good as, “Hi” or “Bye” even if your consort is not wearing blue.

I’m living in Kansas City in the middle of the baseball playoff season on the edge of my seat.

Monday’s ALDS Game 4 was our elimination station- the Royals had to win and they weren’t. After watching at a quiet Ruby Tuesday with Drew and then Laura over their work lunch hours, Laura and I left to our own car radios to get back to work. We would listen to what was surely the end. For us, it never occurred not to listen. To many of my friends, when the going got tough and ugly, they tuned out and turned it off.

On Barry Road I heard the reversed call that ended Terrance Gore’s trip around the bases in the top of the 7th. I heard a two-run Correa home run off a Ryan Madson 3-2 pitch.  Then before I let out my “Ugh” breath, the Astro’s hit a solo home run to go up 6-2 by the end of the 7th.

I entered Oakley’s Parent’s Day Out pick up with a low countenance. I felt defeated and that the playoff run was disappointingly over.

I texted Laura and Drew, “It’s over”

Laura texted back disappointment and righteous anger.

After buckling Oakley up, at the start of the 8th inning, I texted Laura back to say, “Beat defeat! Hold onto Hope.” That’s what I tell Andi and for some reason I told myself and the Royals in that moment, as well.

By the time we drove the 3 miles home, the Royals had hit 3 singles. The bases were loaded and Oaks and I ran to the basement.

Our radio is down there as well as Oakley’s train track so we were both set. Every time they got a hit, and then runs, Oakley and I would run. Laps around the basement. Overly jumpy jumps on the mini-trampoline. Some runs with Oaks right behind me, others with him on my hip. He would high-five and chant “Let’s Go Royal’s- clap-clap- clap” on his own volition and then go back to playing trains. Then I’d scream and jump and he would drop the train to celebrate with me.

So went our act for all of the 41 minutes in the top of the 8th inning.  We came up with the Royal’s ahead 7-6 in the ninth to greet Eli and Andi and welcome them to the basement celebration.

Turns out their speech teacher was sending everyone out of the school yelling, “It’s TIED! They TIED IT UP!”. They listened on the bus radio until their own small voices with big yells took the bus over with “Let’s Go Royals” chants. “You would have heard us on the street Mom!”, Eli assured me.

Hosmer would hit a two-run home run in the ninth and Wade Davis gave us six outs.

They had hoped. They beat defeat.

And hope is what we hold again today. Game 5 will start in exactly two hours  and hope rises high. Confidence and trepidtion sit side by side and blue people gather in homes and at the K.

We have to be grateful for the weeks before this one. For me, my Monday antics- the emotions, words, texts, screams, high fives, and jumps and time with Oaks and listening to the end with Eli, are gifts I hold dear.

To overcome when you’re down is not just a great and rare sports experience, its a design we are built to wear. 

When I am down, if the odds are stacked against my kids, or the score is uneven for the underdog, the call to hope should be heralded. 

To beat defeat is to hold onto hope.

Hope is different than faith- it doesn’t demand an outcome or proof, it just says, “I am choosing to believe the good can come, and the deficit can be erased, and the odds overturned.” Hope says, “Don’t give up and know people are cheering for you.” Hope says, “Being stuck isn’t where I’ll stay.” And hope says, “I hope they can do it tonight.” 

Thanks for reading last week and sending some recommendations my way. 

I’d like to add one more recommendation which is also an invitation.

In the course of the last year and a half, I co-authored, edited, and shared in the writing of four small books about our identity in Christ as a key to health and wholeness.

My aunt is the lead author and gave me the great invitation to come into the writing world with her on these self-help sort of books. We were looking to lead people into a healthier understanding of God, self, and freedom.

Each book has an element of reclamation in it’s title and message. The ministry behind the books is called Reclaim Ministries. To “reclaim” is to take back something lost or stolen or to rescue from an undesirable state.

The books are easy to read and built with questions for self or group reflection. The books include action steps to put what you read into practice.

Please check out these books and find their messages could lead you to hope, healing, freedom, faith, joy, love and peace.

See much more about the Reclaim ministry and each of the books in the “You Were Meant for More” series here.

I am most excited about the third book, Our Dad is Not Mad because of it’s healing and hopeful reminder that God is not angry or judgmental, but bent on pursuit and invitation, participation and love with all people.

Here are the specific links to the books.

Our Dad is Not Mad Softcover book

Our Dad is Not Mad Ebook

If you live close to me in KC, I have copies on hand for $10. Just let me know!

Thanks for the shameless self-promotion day here on lindseyosborne.com.  I share in hopes they will be blessed to be a blessing to you!

When you slow down enough to pay attention to people in your path…

And you say YES as often as possible…

With people who cheer for you all around you every day…

You’re living in a earthly experience of what God intends for all of life to be.

Having just returned from Young Life’s Castaway Club where we spent 24 days working, living, laughing, learning, listening, playing, and walking…I feel an overwhelming sense of having been somewhere set apart.

I return with memories in my eyes, ears, heart and head that give me vision moving forward in their remembering back.

At Castaway this year, we stood up for slowing down. 

For the first two days of the assignment, we sat as a group of 20 staff people from Colorado, Illinois, Iowa, Indiana, Minnesota, Missouri, Tennessee, Kansas, and Kentucky and proposed a posture for our positions. We talked about an attitude we would cultivate to season our service. Everyone had input and many ideas found their source in scripture. Gratitude, humility, stick-to-itiveness, and service beyond self, came through as themes.

The speaker, Dave, painted a picture of moving slow enough that we could be interrupted as we went about our jobs. There would be the tension of having to get somewhere on time, with work that was due, and yet the necessity of being available to people in the project’s path. The ultimate example of perfection here: Jesus, in Mark 5:21-40- on pursuit to heal Jairus’ daughter, he slows to stop the suffering of a bleeding and broken woman. For me, it meant stopping at the center sidewalk to talk to a leader about her girl who wasn’t opening up, and then hustling to make it to the meeting downstairs in the Windjammer. Sure I could stop to listen, and then I could run with my backpack bumping to catch back up!

To move on mission, with space for interruption, exposed my natural tendency toward tasks and my usual bent towards double tasking that takes me out of listening. At Castaway this year, I learned to literally walk in step with the Spirit, listening to the person right in front of me, hearing them, and responding as I was led and able. Every time I slowed or stopped, it felt like a muscle was being pulled and stretched- by the end of the month, indeed I was more limber, able to flex and bend.

Oaks getting to sail with Kristian and Maelie- Oak’s little girl friend who held her own. He respected such a strong woman.

I try to be a “Yes-saying” Mom. Limiting and saving my “No’s” for when I really need them to keep my kids safe or help make them strong, smart, or spiritual. I think saying “Yes” opens up opportunities and gives space for DISCOVERY (“Sure go down to the dock with a fishing pole.“), RISK (“Yes you can climb up the cliff”.), JOY (“Okay, you can buy something from the vending machine.“), and  FULL ACCESS (“Yes, go for it! Climb the climbing wall again!“)

My kids hear me say NO when necessary and unfortuantely a few extra unneccessary “Nos” as well.

At Castaway, for the property staff and us as assigned team members, we wanted to say YES as often as possible to give campers full access to what Castaway has to offer, and YES to their sense of adventure, spirit, energy, joy, and discovery.

My favorite example of this coming true came over my radio one day.

“Sail beach to Kelsi”

“Come in Sail Beach”

“The campers want to take the sail boats out and there just isn’t very much wind. Do we let them?”

“Yes, sure. If they think it will be fun, let them go. Give them a paddle and send them off.”

I saw Kelsi right after hearing that conversation and affirmed her YES saying! She was opening up all that was being offered, letting kids have control and ideas and ultimately telling them once again, “This is here for you. Enjoy. Feel loved, feel celebrated, and know you have full access to a life full of adventure, joy and discovery.”

At Castaway this year, we were surrounded by support that allowed us to be our truest selves. 

To the last point, indeed Castaway captures a bit of heaven on earth. The intent is to present the gospel of God’s great love and good news to high school kids in an environment made for them, with excellence and intentionality, and care and love.

My family benefits from being in the environment of a whole community on mission to serve outside themselves to show big love. Each of my kids had advocates, fans, and friends that blessed them.

Andi was carried around and cheered on by Sean, Intern in charge of guest services and zip/climb. He remembered her from being on my summer staff in 2011 and was impressed by her tenacity to climb and her conversations with campers and his team. With such encouragement and support, Andi scaled the rock wall, explored Castaway with confident independence, and danced The Whip on stage at the end of every opera having packed and created her own costume. Those black boots! Dana our nanny took a whole afternoon to spend time with her and they doubled up on zip line rides!

Andi helps throw frisbees

Oaks was extravagantly loved and worthy of it. He was incredibly lovable all month. Oaks was friendly and smiley, talkative and tolerant of constant attention. He tried hard to learn names and remembered so many. With the summer staff and work crew, he was silly and sweet. With the kids in the Ketch and Dory, he was energetic and engaged…wanting to play all day. Simply sand filled his afternoons at the beach, with ice cream snacks on the way up to 4 hour naps…bedtime moved to 10:30pm. Oakley loved playing “sliberee” (that’s Frisbee) and walking all by himself. He loved Dana and couldn’t wait for Daddy to come. He woke up with snuggles and threw fits so much less often than at home- mostly at meals that were loud and crowded. He was loved and lived to love back.

Eli’s birthday shake! Happy 9 years old E!

Eli surprised me week one by spending so much time at the bead cart, crafting necklaces and bracelets. He was friendly with the summer staff who worked there and less interested in zip lining this year. A bit slower and deliberate in smaller things. He moved from beads to spike ball and octoball too. Eli learned from campers how to play and then taught others who came later in the weeks- thus winning the hearts of Olathe High School girls.

Eli’s spike ball friends.

Climbing the cliff…YES you can!

He was independent and kind. One leader said, “Your son bumped into me in the doorway and stopped, turned around, and said, ‘I’m sorry I bumped you. That was my  fault.'” He showed maturity in taking on a part of the Opera that meant he had to learn lines, lip sync, and dance on stage! He performed for 3 weeks with humility and hard work. He was celebrated nicely by new friends and had great guys his age as buddies.

All three of my kids were at their best. Overcoming obstacles that usually trip them up, accepting the love and encouragement offered to them, and sensing the freedom, community, and adventure all around them, they were more capable of kindness and tenacity than in our normal life. I was overwhelmed with the love others gave to my kids. I learned a lot from other moms and was grateful for the chance to live with such great families, couples, and individuals.

There is no other time or place where the five of us can feel so loved, accepted and needed on mission.

The beauty of the property, the capable, personal and self-sacrifical interns, the fun families, and the shared mission of people spread all over the country, living next door to each other for three weeks, touched and changed us.

We hope we left little hand prints to help the people we met and served as well.

When you live in love, you are living as you should be, and find yourself free to be all of who you really are!

Thank you Castaway. Thank you.

Oaks often brings his stool over to help/see. Today he said, “Watch your toes Mama, I’m coming.”

Cousin pool day!

Eli gives June the last half of her bottle before nap #2

Oaks couldn’t wait for June to wake up and get up…so he just got in!

IF you spend a day taking care of four children (3 of my own brood and one precious niece!), THEN you’ll end up with a full brain and short blog.

IF you put a stool in your kitchen, THEN you’ll have good help.

IF you buy peaches, THEN you’ll need to go back to the store to buy vanilla ice cream. Am I right?!

IF you live in the Coves, THEN you have the gift of very mature and developed trees- gorgeous in fall splendor or spring bloom.

Our deck trees- cicada stomping grounds

IF you have yards full of mature and developed trees, THEN you’ll have a huge harvest of cicadas.

Listen to their song in our yard today! Cicadas

One of the 1000s

IF you have a loud cicada-landing-area as your yard, THEN you’ll get landed on by swooping cicadas. Eeeek!

castaway search…look what I found!

IF you Google Castaway Young Life camp for the address, THEN images of the property will pop up and you’ll be overwhelmed with anticipation and swooned with great memories- stopped right there in the middle of your productivity to breathe and smile.

IF you grow small leaf lettuce in your garden, THEN you’ll eat a few weed leaves, bits of dirt, and a smattering of bugs.

IF you’ve already eaten a bug or too in fresh garden salads,

Our little lettuce leaves with weeds all creepin’

THEN you’ll think the bits of basil in the store bought salad dressing, are bugs.

IF you pray and hold onto hope, THEN more kids will sign up for Young Life camp.

IF you build a swing set (or go grab one from someone’s yard like we did), THEN siblings will find each other in play and laughter- sweet summer music.

The girls

IF you stop to look around you, THEN you’ll notice the connection between decisions and outcomes and realize you cannot predict, nor would you want to, the shape of your life and the moments that make it meaningful.

I’ve been tired lately. Busy weeks and big events and summer starting…yesterday I dragged myself to the gym. Once there, I could hardly pick up the barbell I’d loaded. I felt like laying down next to it instead for a 15 minute nap, not a 15 minute AMRAP (as many rounds as possible).

On the other hand, I have thought often lately, “I’ll just never get tired of that!” 

I did a 10 minute YouTube yoga workout a few weeks ago and appreciated the instructor’s reminder to put my mind into the stretch- sending intentional effort into the muscle I was attempting to manipulate. “Where your mind goes, your energy flows.“ he said.

How true.

If my mind is filled with worry and fear, my energy goes to panic or protection. When I stew in mental defeat, I lose energy to recover and revive.

If I can focus on gratitude, my spirit lifts, my perspective is more positive and my breathing slows.

When I can wrap my mind around making a mental change, and even in fatigue, I’ve been trying (and enjoying) sending my mind to joy and thankfulness that my energy might follow.

I’ll never get tired of: 

• spring blossoms blooming
• being loved by Drew
• eating outside
• seeing mountains early on a blue-sky morning
• meeting new babies (I’m writing from the home of my first ever nephew…brand new Baby Wilson!)
• seeing my kids asleep (and wanting to wake them up and play with them just then!)
• saying Oakley’s birthday- 10-11-12
• ending my days with Drew
• summer schedules (see last week’s post!)
• Castaway sunsets
• remembering favorite memories
• shopping with my sisters
• grace
• good food fixed for me
• watching Eli, Andi, and Oakley explore, change, grow, smile, laugh, talk, ask questions, give answers

• and much more…that I’ll think about while strolling the streets of Chicago in the sunshine with my inlaws..more good things…extended family, being outside, days away from ordinary life.

May your mind (and mine) go to the blessings and what’s best, so that your energy flows to making peace and joy in the world, living loved and holding onto hope. 

We’ve had a soggy start to summer with rain making our grass grow green and our baseball games (tonight) postponed for later play. 

No matter the weather, this past Friday opened up my heart and schedule for my new favorite time of year: summer! Without school and with siblings together, with weddings, and new cousins being born, the summer 2015 is sure to be a good one. Kicking off right with a visit from Aunt Nat and Uncle John started the first of many memory making moments.

As we set out to summer…

• We look back in gratitude.

Both of the teachers Eli and Andi had at school this year were wonderful.

Mrs. Spence gave Eli the space to use his energy and expand his mind all the while caring deeply about him. She was creative and patient in how she taught day after day.

Miss Culver had unbounded energy and excitement that gave Andi the confidence to grow as a reader and friend. She was attentive to details and always ready to party!

Lately, when my own kids have quirks, or are momentarily, but brutally, annoying with their silliness, I’ve stopped to close my eyes and tried to multiply my amount of being bothered by 22 times in order to understand their sweet teacher’s daily reality. Eeek. Shudder. Shake it off.

It’s one thing for a parent to love their kid but for someone else to truly care for and enjoy your child brings out a feeling of humble gratitude I sensed so much more this year than others.

Bless those women and may they enjoy their break! 

Back to the setting out of summer!

• Appreciation abounds for the days Eli and Andi spent at Line Creek, learning and becoming little 7-habit conscience kids with new friends and chances to expand their minds and worlds. And yet, I’m so glad they are done! and home for over 72 days straight!

• We will shape our days with some sort of a schedule for sanity and maximum fun and effectiveness!

• The chalkboard in the kitchen contains our first summer brainstorm.

• Here are our daily details I set forth with kid input:

What we might plan on paper will come to life in ways we cannot imagine and must fully and freely live into- with many rabbit trails worth going off plan!

I’m so ready for sunshine and siblings, swingset and swimming!

We can’t wait to meet and cuddle Baby Cousin Wilson, all new and healthy in Chicago! We’ll wait just a little longer to meet and cuddle Baby Girl Sustad- on her way, coming soon to Vancouver!

We will walk down the aisle in celebration of Melissa and Chris this weekend as they wed!

We will celebrate Laura’s big 3-0 in addition to our own summer bdays and anniversary #11!

Castaway calls us north June 25-July 18th and Colorado will host us as we host our family reunion in August.

We end summer with a beginning- Bonnie and Joshua’s wedding in Washington.

OFF WE GO! See you in the sunshine!